How can we stay safe if we let go of our fear, hurt and anger?

Following on from last week..

From an NLP perspective whenever we help someone tackle a personal issue we look at how to preserve the original “positive intention”. For example when we talk about letting go of either fear, hurt or anger we need to honour the original reason we kept it in the first place.

Sometimes this reason is outside our conscious awareness and may take considerable reflection to uncover. It is possible with the help of a skilled practitioner to deal with maintaining the positive intention using an NLP process that allows this to be handled at the unconscious level.

If you want to work through this yourself it is important that you ask yourself some vital questions to check the meaning of your positive intention. One option is to meditate on each of the following questions and write your answers down.

“What is the learning from my experience?”

If your responses are things like “you just can’t trust anyone” it is worth meditating on this answer too until you find something that allows you to move in the direction of healing. For instance perhaps the underpinning learning is how to spot when someone is mistreating you or deceiving you. The learning might be the signs of untrustworthy behaviour. This will allow you to move away from the limiting belief that “no one is trustworthy”.

Now for the next qu3stion to ask yourself.

 “What resources, strengths and knowledge have I gained?”

Often even very painful experiences have provided us with unexpected rewards. For instance, in childhood I was sexually abused by someone who managed to present a friendly face. As a result I am able to help other people who have had similar experiences. Having lived through this and moved on I have more empathy than I might otherwise have. Interestingly enough I have done the forgiveness part with this issue!

And now for a third question.

“Is this positive intention out of date?”

Sometimes the original positive intention was very relevant for a child how is often powerless in many situations however as an adult we naturally often have more resources. Is the fear, hurt and anger related to this no longer serving a purpose?

I’ll write more next week. Today we start day one of our NLP Practitioner training so all is excitement here!

Couple of quick announcements.

  1. Next week I’m running my two day Transactional Analysis for Coaches. I still have some place left and would really like to fill them. If you would like to join us email me and I might be able sort out a last minute booking rate for you. :0)
  2. For those of you interested in NLP our next free two day workshop is in May. Check out our main website for detatils on how to book.

About Melody @ GWizlearning

Melody spent fourteen years gathering experience of the business world working in banking, telecommunications and the public sector before co-founding The GWiz Learning Partnership in 1993. Melody has a Masters Degree in Applied Positive Psychology, a degree in Psychology and a diploma in Psychotherapy. She is an NLP Master Trainer which allows her to run NLP Practitioner, NLP Master Practitioner and NLP Trainer Training courses certified by the Positive School of Intrinsic Neuro-Linguistc Psychology. She is also a qualified Myers Briggs practitioner and EI practitioner and added to all this is five years Transactional Analysis training, meaning she is able to help organisations access the hidden potential in their staff. She is also in demand for her work in transforming average or even troubled teams into high performers. Melody is a visiting lecturer at University of East London, teaching "Wellbeing and Positive Psychology" to undergraduates. Additionally, she is a member of the CIPD and is ILM accredited. Melody's interests are many and varied. She has a keen interest in personal development, canine and wolf psychology, conservation, movies and running. She also enjoys western horse riding, walking the GWiz dogs, nature watching and stage combat (particularly sword fighting).
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