For the last few weeks we have been exploring some aspects of handling other people as part of my series on personal power. This week I want to bring it back to you.
As I write this we are about to start day eight of our NLP Practitioner and I’m reflecting on some of the magnificent steps the students have already taken. Yesterday I was facilitating an understanding of a concept in NLP called “Being at Cause” versus “Being at Effect”.
Cause and effect are common terms in everyday language however in NLP the meaning is slightly different.
To “be at effect” means to feel at the mercy of something or someone. It places us in the victim role, feeling ‘done to’. It is more challenging to make personal shifts from this position as we want to blame others and want them to change.
Being ‘at cause’ means to feel in control, in the driving seat, understanding our role within a context, problem and/or outcome.
When we are “at effect” we perceive ourselves to be powerless. Our perception tells us that we have no control over a situation including how other people are treating us. For many people this experience persists because they lack the tools or knowledge to make a change.
The really important point to take from this is to recognise that there are tools and knowledge that can transform this feeling of powerlessness.
The goal will be to realise that we always have the option of being “at cause” no matter how unlikely that may appear on first inspection.
Next week I will begin a series of blogs providing you with some tools to make this happen for yourself.